Posts Tagged ‘college’

College Concerns and Worries

Wednesday, September 5th, 2012

As young adults, we are prone to taking a “trial and error” approach to life. We know one of the many goals associated with college is the promise of a better life. We also know getting through college is a mission itself, filled with all types of twists and turns we never see coming. Here are a couple of concerns you may or may not have experienced, and some pretty good solutions to help keep your stress leveled.

 

Finances

 

Money will always be a major issue. Unless you hit the lottery or were born into royalty, you’re probably counting every penny you spend. Everything from getting to school to the afternoon snack craving can become a problem.

As college students we tend to want to blow our money on the first things we can think of. Saving is a minimal priority. HelpSaveMyDollars.com’s creator Scott Gamm developed a theory stating fifty percent of college students have 4 or more credit cards. An even more shocking statistic is that eighty percent of students fail to pay off their credit card bill.

The key is to keep an eye on your money and always track what you are spending. I’ve written an article entitled “College Savings Doesn’t Mean College Boredom” in which I talk about having fun in New York the cheapest way possible.

 

 

Social Life

Balancing school and anything else can prove to be quite complicated. Whether it’s a job or an internship, you will find you don’t have much time for anything else. Twenty three percent of full-time undergrads, who are 24 or younger, work 20 hours or more a week. With hours like that plus the 15 hours or more you plan to spend in classes and on after class activities (labs and group projects anyone?), you won’t have much time for anything else.

Although having any kind of social life can seem like an extra burden, it’s not impossible and is more than healthy for a college student. Someone paying you a visit after you come home from work is one way that comes to mind (because you know . . . you’ll be too tired to go out and all). Someone can come meet you at your job after your shift. Meeting people at school is also a good way to kill two birds with one stone. Trust me . . . you’ll be spending A LOT of time with these people, so you might as well get to know them. You might like them.

 

Professors

 

We’ve all heard it before, “I have to take Professor (place name here). He’s an easy A” or “I don’t want Professor (alchy). He’s always drunk.”

Okay . . . maybe the last one is just me, but you get the idea.

There are those out there who simply don’t care who ends up teaching them a specific course, but for many of us, there’s that one professor that just gets us. Early registration is the key to getting the professors you want, the classes you want, at the times you want to take them. Some schools even give you cash stipends for early registration, which is even more of an incentive.

Personally, I never understood math until I had this one professor. She never let me (or anyone for that matter) leave class until she was sure we understood the material. This may seem like torture but I didn’t fail a test that whole semester . . . . . So I guess it worked, at least in my case

 

Personal Problems

 

We all have lives outside of college and many times it’s hard for our personal issues to not get in the way. Students with children have to constantly worry about their kid as it will always be one of their top priorities. Students can be involved in relationships that just swallow up their time (and if this is you, you should really learn how to prioritize) among other things.

I’ve been in three different living situations ever since I started school and I’m working on a fourth and hopefully my last for a while. Going to school and not knowing if I’ll even have a home to come back to has definitely been one of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with in my life. All the “stay focused” and “keep your eyes on the prize” speeches never made any sense until I reached this period in my life.

Even though life can overwhelm you at times, it is important to know why you enrolled in this first place. It’s easy to forget why we started on this journey when all the unnecessary crap is constantly thrown in our face. Whatever the issue is, it’s important to know you have the strength, the tools and the support to get through whatever you’re going through. Also, you ARE working towards a better future and that’s more than most people can say.

 

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Carlos L., Monroe College. Read my blog!!  Follow me on Twitterand Facebook :)

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Professors 2.0

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012

It’s about that time: school is right around the corner and so are professors! Not only do you have to worry about making sure your bank account is on point and getting your student savings, but you have to make sure you make a good first impression with your professors.

 

Meeting a professor for the first time  

Particularly if you’re a first year student en route to your first real college class, you might be a little nervous when classes start. Depending on how big your College or University is, a typical 100-level class can range from 60 to 200 students! The professor can try his or her best to get to know everyone, but seeing as professors’ schedules are so busy, it’s up to you to make them notice you. You also have to keep in mind that in the future you may need a recommendation from a professor for a job. With that being said, not only do you want to do well in the class and build an academic relationship, but you also want to build a personal one. One tip is to simply go up to the professor after class and introduce yourself. You can choose to introduce yourself with your name and year in school or perhaps just your name—it’s up to you. Then, simply tell him or her that you are excited to be in the class this semester. These simple lines are going to introduce you to the professor but will also tell them that you are serious about the class and care about forming a relationship.

 

Taking a class with a professor you had before

If you have had the same professor for a new class, you are already at an advantage in terms of building a quality professor-student relationship. However, whether a great deal of time has passed or not, you still want to be able to maintain that relationship. After the first class with a well-acquainted professor, go and say hello. Tell him or her that you are excited to be taking the class and look forward to having a great experience like that of the last class you had with him or her.  This move and can make your relationship stronger and will let the professor know that you are a serious student.

 

Note: the above advice is intended if you did well in the previous class with that same professor.  If you failed or didn’t do as well in the class as you hoped, and you end up taking the class over, I would advise something different.  Instead of going up to the professor after class, you should visit the professor during his or her office hours. Meeting a professor during office hours can set a more intimate and professional meeting atmosphere and gives you more time to communicate. Tell your professor that you are thankful to be allowed to take the class over and that you look forward to doing better this time around. Your professor will know that you mean business, and he or she will have a clean impression of you instead of the one you last made.

 

I have only touched upon a few of many ways to make good first impressions on professors. If you would like more tips or advice, leave a comment and I will get back to you!

 

Joanne, Simmons College ’15. Read my personal blog!

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2 Broke Girls: Solidifying Racial Stereotypes

Tuesday, July 17th, 2012

Created by Michael Patrick King and Whitney Cummings, the nationally-syndicated show on CBS, 2 Broke Girls, manages to transcend the thin line that constitutes political correctness. It wholeheartedly—for cheap laughs, nonetheless—embraces ethnic stereotypes and sexism and, by doing so, further solidifies it in the audience’s consciousness.

King was in a heated debate with the show’s creators in a panel discussion about the racial and sexual overtones used throughout the show:

“The big story about race on our show is that so many are represented,” King said. “The cast is not only multi‑ethnic, including the regulars and the guest stars, but it’s also incredibly not ageist. We represent what New York used to be and what is currently very much still alive in Williamsburg, which is a melting pot.”

On the show’s Asian character, Han Lee, King said:

“I like Han. I like his character. I like the fact he’s an immigrant. I like that he’s trying to fit into America. I like the fact in the last three episodes we haven’t made an Asian joke, we’ve only made short jokes … Would you say the ‘blonde rich bitch’ is a stereotype? Would you say that the tough‑ass, dark, sarcastic‑mouthed waitress is a stereotype? I like all of them.”

King uses his sexuality to try to defend his use of stereotypes, saying, “I’m gay! I’m putting in gay stereotypes every week. I don’t find any of it offensive, any of it. I find it comic to take everybody down.”

King conveniently forgets, however, that Asian stereotypes were extremely hateful up until the 1960s, when both black Americans and Asian Americans were finally given the right to vote and participate in civic duties.

There were a string of riots against the Chinese in the early and late 19th century by Americans. In Los Angeles in 1871, seventeen Chinese were massacred in broad view of public eyes. In fact, the public enthusiastically took up violence along with the perpetrators. “Hang them!” was a common phrase exclaimed by the bystanders and “as the Chinese were hauled up, a man on a porch roof danced a jig and gave voice to the resentment many Americans felt over the Chinese willingness to work for low wages. ‘Come on, boys, patronize home trade,’ the man sang out.” Seventeen Chinese men were lynched in front of men, women, and children. (Scharf, J. Thomas, “The Farce of the Chinese Exclusion Acts,” The North American Review. Jan. 1898. Volume 166, Issue 494, pp. 85-98.)

I’m surprised that the show doesn’t have Lee wear some “traditional” Asian attire and have him speak in a farcical “Chinese” language to further drive him from the realm of the American. When King says, “I like the fact in the last three episodes we haven’t made an Asian joke, we’ve only made short jokes,” he means, Asians are short, so we’re going to run with that. The New Yorker called the show  ”so racist it is less offensive than baffling.”

Look at successful comedies out on television now: How I Met Your Mother pokes fun at contemporary social life with complex characters (Barney Stinson is an enigma), New Girl shows character-layering while still allowing Zooey Deschanel be her bubbly self, Modern Family portrays all likable characters who, although they may follow some stereotypes, are able to present complexity, and the cast of the long-cancelled Arrested Development consists of diverse characters all with their own specific personalities, not just a quick scheme to establish what’s already known in our collective consciousness.

Tim Goodman of the Hollywood Reporter probably put it best:

“Every time Han gets to say something on 2 Broke Girls, the undercurrent is that it’s funny because it’s broken English. Plus he’s really short and geeky and non-sexual (there may have been other stereotypes to plop on top of him, but maybe creators Whitney Cummings and Michael Patrick King thought too much was enough, which would certainly stick with the general theme of the show). In any case, what CBS is doing every Monday night is trotting out one of the most regressive and stunning racist devices a network has produced in five or more seasons.”

King does admit that he wants to flesh out the supporting characters, but that’s what stereotypes create—one-dimensional figures for the sake of cheap, unwitty and predictable laughs. Count the number of times you hear the laugh track played throughout the show—you’ll understand what I mean.

I’m surprised the show hasn’t ended up yet as two broke writers. Michael Imato and Michael Anderson call the show “creatively bankrupt” and “just bloody awful.” I also found a comment on Grantland to be very poignant:

 

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Think About The Big Picture | Victoria Rossi: A Photographer in Motion

Monday, July 16th, 2012

Growing up, I thought the only combo better than peanut butter and jelly was a pen and paper. I have always had an affinity for writing and using it as a tool and an art form. However, I didn’t see my writing as a talent until I started writing poetry, performing in open mics, and participating in talent shows. Once I discovered my immense passion for poetry, I knew I had to reach out and get others involved in their own talents. When I first started writing, I saw poetry as my salvation. It introduced me to new people, new experiences, and taught me that life exists beyond the L train. This post is about how you can use your talent to help others see that their life can change, as well as how to use your talent to help your community.

Looking for people with the same affinity for using their talents to help others, I found Victoria (also known as Vee) Rossi, a 20 year-old photographer/college student.

“I started doing photography after my aunt passed away my senior year of high school. She used to own a photo lab in Barrington, Rhode Island and was the relative who always had her hand attached the camera at any family function. She loved looking through pictures, collecting pictures, taking pictures, and I guess I picked that up from her after she passed away, sort of paying homage to her. I do photography because I love creating things and I especially love creating images and having the capability of manipulating emotions and making people feel one way or another or see something or realize what they haven’t seen. Some of my favorite things or people to photograph are the dancers in my mom’s dance studio in Cranston, Rhode Island. Not only are they brilliantly talented but they’re willing to push limits photographically and also in the areas of dance. It’s always nice to photograph them also because they’re so eager to create something beautiful. I help them and they help me. I also will go to the dance competitions and photograph them while they’re in their prime competing because that’s when you really see the intensity. I not only see photography as an emotional outlet, but also as a possibility to make a career. They always say that you should do something that you love and something that makes you happy, and I think that I may have found that for me.”

Here are some recent photos Victoria has taken of her mother’s students:

      

Victoria has also done shoots for her school, Simmons College, and some of their drama productions including The Vagina Monologues. From first position to on pointe, the dancers and their art are captured via Victoria’s own art.

 

Check out Victoria and her Facebook Page and Photography Blog

Now that you’ve seen how Victoria gives back to her community, here are some ways that you can help your community with your talents:

 

Host an Art Show:

If you are an artist, painter, sculptor, metalworker, etc., go to your local YMCA, community center, or even a friend’s back yard and host an art show. You can sell your art by donation or fixed prices, or you can even just have your art on show for viewing and charge a small admission fee. Then, the proceeds can go to your local YMCA, city program, etc.

Have an Open Mic:

Taking the same idea as the art show, you can find a space to have poets, singers, musicians, and even actors come and perform. You can sell drinks or charge a small admission fee and raise money that way.

Get some friends, and direct a small play in the neighborhood:

Gather your actor, musician, dancer friends, and host a play or opera, or even a concert!

Is a local business or store you frequent looking a little dusty?:

If you have a way with the paintbrushes or even organizing, offer your services in exchange for promotion of your talent!

All of these are inexpensive and help in many ways. They help you meet more talented people, polish skills as well as gain new ones, and most importantly, they help the community.

Now that you’ve read about how to get involved, go out and do it! Here’s a great coupon for art supplies! Click HERE for a printable version!

Joanne, Simmons College ’15. Read my personal blog!

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Bareburger

Wednesday, March 21st, 2012

New York might well be one of the best places in the world for food. The City has been the gateway to the USA for over a century with over a third of all Americans able to trace their ancestry through Ellis Island, and with such an astonishing mix of races and peoples from all over the world, diversity is the watchword in NYC. It’s no surprise that all these peoples kept their local cuisines going – many of them have managed to keep whole languages going!

With so much choice in food in New York, it can be hard keeping track of it all. You would certainly be forgiven for thinking that Pizza was devised here, the way it has taken hold… But the only, really, truly American food, has to be the humble hamburger, which like so much of US culture, seems to have gone on to dominate the World! Like all food that has found its way to New York, it seems to be popular, and there are now so many interesting hamburger restaurants and joints, and variations on the concept it can be impressive, if not rather overwhelming.

I had the pleasure recently to try one of the newest and more rapidly developing restaurants selling their own version of this timeless classic, Bareburger. After an initial start in Brooklyn, this small but rather excellent little chain is now franchising across the city. I had the pleasure of trying it at 85 2nd Ave along with my better half; Bottom Line Up Front: Tasty burger. Do you need to know more?

The restaurant itself is on a fairly quiet corner, a few blocks down from St Marks. It is a really bright space, decorated with a slight, modern twist on classic rural Americana – though the fork chandelier made me feel slightly wary! The service was quick, pleasant and very knowledgeable. The hamburgers themselves are close to a design-your-own set up, where you can specify the meat and the bun with selections including Beef, Turkey, Elk, Boar, Portabella Mushroom, Brioche Bun, Lettuce Wrap, Wheat Flour Wrap or a Multi-Grain Roll. Wanting to get the best comparison, I took a classic beef/roll combo, but I’ll have to return to try the Elk now…

A Classic American Feast!

Aside from the content, there is also the style to consider, with a further fourteen menu choices for your burger. I took the ‘Supreme’, while my date went for the Maple Bacon Cheeseburger. We were not disappointed at all. The presentation was really excellent and both burgers were juicy, tasty and different enough that we could be certain Bareburger has its own signature and style. The food came in the classic basket, with a simple bu t very effective selection of sides – we took the onion rings and fries. Even the beverages were organic, and my blueberry soda went really well with the whole meal, that unusual, organic edge of a healthy drink (without being so-called ‘health food’) perfectly complimenting the natural food.

Food Goes in Here

You do not get hamburgers in the UK like you do in New York, and I love them. I have a running list in my head of the top 5 places, but it just doesn’t seem like enough (or even reasonable to try and rank them!), and now I have another one to juggle in there. Bareburger has nine (soon to be ten) outlets across the City. If you like your hamburgers, if you like to support good organic food, and particularly if both, you need to check them out. We have a student discount coupon for you right here!

Dan
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What I Learned in My Public Speaking Class

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2011

originally appeared on speaking-effective.kethal.com

Given a choice between Design of a Newspaper Page (or something similar to that) and Public Speaking, I chose the latter without hesitation. I have always loved to speak in front of large groups, despite the fact that I often trembled inside. I can manage my nerves well, though, and I enjoy delivering my message; therefore, I was eager to learn new skills through this class.

Unlike me, there are many students who are petrified to take a public speaking class because they hate standing in front of people and talking to them, or simply because they believe that they will never need speaking skills for their career. If this sounds like you, let me assure you: whatever your future profession will be, you will definitely have to make presentations, whether you like it or not, so why not learn it as early as possible and be prepared?

Since many universities oblige you to take public speaking class anyway, I would suggest that you do it during your first semester, as it will be helpful while you are at school. Here are some useful things I learned in my public speaking class:

1. Everyone is nervous while speaking in public, no matter how confident he or she looks. Even your professors feel tension inside. It is just not comfortable to face a large group of people and have their eyes and ears turned at you.

2. Developing your public speaking skills means learning how to control your fear and delivering your message successfully. The more often you practice what you learn, the more confident you will feel delivering every other presentation, so you should use every opportunity to talk in class, whether it is a formal report or a mere answer to someone’s question.

3. No matter how interesting your presentation is, it is always hard to listen if there are no visuals, and don’t you hope for a “first-time student discount” (meaning that the audience will not sympathize with you even if this is a debut). Therefore, you should always do a short Powerpoint presentation, prepare handouts or simply draw a poster. Anything works, as long as there is some kind of visual back up for your presentation. If there are names that the audience may not know, you should put them down, especially if their pronunciation is not a casual one. When your listeners see the information in front of them, they understand it better and remember it longer.

4. There is more than one type of audience: friendly, indifferent, neutral, hostile. The easiest kind to deal with is the neutral one, as they are the material that you can work with. You can tell them whatever you want, and it is up to you to keep them interested. Friendly audience is not as easy as you suppose it is because these listeners usually know who you are and think highly of you, so there is no way you can deliver a presentation that is not as strong as your previous one. Otherwise, they will easily get bored and won’t pay attention. The hardest task is to engage an indifferent audience, as they are not interested in your topic, or you, and will most likely sleep through your presentation. As far as hostile audience is concerned, they are the most fun group to deal with, as it is your job to change their mind about you or the topic you are talking about. You have to be well-prepared and predict what kind of questions may be asked and what the audience’s objections will be. Knowing the type of audience is a must, as it helps to deliver the message in the most effective way. It can be compared to researching on student savings: you should know before you go which place may give you the best deal and how to get this deal from them.

5. Eye contact is powerful. If you stare at your notes, or, what’s even worse, read from the page, no one will listen to you. People usually think that you are poorly prepared, have no idea what your presentation is about and they feel like it’s wasting their time to listen to you. A good idea is to create an outline (on a piece of paper or index cards, whatever you prefer) with major points you are going to make. Write down quotes from experts if you are using any. With this material, you can spend more time looking at your audience to study and react to their facial expressions and gestures. For example, if they look confused, ask if they want you to repeat or clarify what you’ve just said. If they yawn, you should probably give them an interesting piece of information that you were saving for later.

6. Once your presentation is ready and your outline is completed, you have to practice. You may need to record your voice and listen to it, to repeat your presentation in front of the mirror at least, 5 to 10 times, so that when the actual presentation takes place, you will be well-prepared and less nervous. Later on, when you become more experienced, you won’t need to practice so much, but 5 times is generally recommended. Just imagine how awed your classmates will be when you deliver your well-rehearsed informative presentation!

7. And finally, always leave time for questions. You may hate to be asked, but how else will you know that your message was understood and remembered? This is perhaps the most exciting part, as through the questions you can see whether your presentation was clear, what you should improve on and how the message was taken in general. The time you should put aside for questions is usually 3-5 minutes, so there is nothing you should really be scared of.

Ekaterina Lalo

You can find more of my articles on my personal blog www.nycvalues.blogspot.com or check me out on http://hubpages.com/profile/katenka_lalo

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To Be Or Not To Be…

Tuesday, August 10th, 2010

Let’s face it- higher education can be very expensive these days and living in a city like NY where nothing comes cheap doesn’t remedy the situation.  As a student, I found that my bank account was so often burdened by an array of bills- credit cards, phone bills (I swear, I barely use my phone!), transportation, buying a decent meal.  Any pocket change that I managed to come across was often devoted to things of great importance- hanging out with friends or attempting to keep up with the latest fashion trends (life is a runway, you gotta work it, honey).

These days, however, the dwindling economy leaves little to no room for many to even entertain these notions.  Many are just struggling to make ends meet. An inevitable concern for students is the ever rising cost of college textbooks. With its poor buyback value (bookstores will only buy used textbooks for a fraction of  its purchase price) and lack of relevance once classes are over, students are often reluctant to fork over so much change for a textbook.

Our friends at Shakespeare and Co. are trying to make students lives just a bit simpler with their rent-a-textbook deals. Their site, http://rental.shakeandco.com, makes renting and receiving books (delivered in as little as 24 hrs) a cinch and with over three million books in stock,  its more than likely that you will find exactly what you’re looking for at a fraction of the cost.  Love to use that neon highlighter or scribble side notes onto your text? NO PROBLEM. Shakespeare and Co. encourages you to do so without getting penalized for vandalism.

So if you’re looking for a cost effective, worry free way get your textbooks for the coming semester, Shakepeare and Co. is definitely the way to go! Hurry though- classes are right around the corner!

-Milka Adera, The New School ’12

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Late Night Creations

Friday, July 2nd, 2010

written by Sabina Ashbaugh

We always substitute an egg with two tablespoons of vanilla soymilk—a slight variation that leaves the dough runny and easier to mix with the cracked wooden spoon. The timer is set for 12 minutes, not 14 as the cookbook suggests, with a reminder at the six-minute mark to switch the top and bottom trays in the oven. Despite these careful discrepancies, accumulated over countless nights, our creations are never completely predictable. We speculate whether it might be the heat of the dimly lit kitchen, and that volatile summer breeze that seeps in through the windows and seems to soften the contours of the room.
Despite our many trials, my sister and I never fully plan our baking efforts, or even carefully measure out the ingredients of our amended recipes. The soymilk substitution, now a permanent step in the cookie making process, came from a late realization that the egg carton was deceptively empty. As if to support this impulsiveness, the planned desserts baked for family dinners—the pumpkin or apple pies, the blueberry cobblers, the cinnamon buns, the madeleines—are never as good as the spontaneous endeavors to satisfy late night cravings. The immediate satisfaction of these creations quickly assuaged the worries and anxieties amassed during school or work. Tasks divided and ingredients laid out, my sister and I get to work setting right the wrongs of the day.
It has been a year now since I moved away from home. Some months have flown by while others have painstakingly inched to a close, with pangs of homesickness and late night baking cravings that seemed to arise out of nowhere. Family, a concept that had seemed so natural and tangible just a year ago, has slowly been abstracted to stand for that sense of place so radically reconfigured after leaving for school. In times of stress, I often caught myself about to call the house with a confused plea of “What should I do?”
With distance I have come to realize how often I unintentionally underappreciated this form of support. I cringe at the thought that the ease and spontaneity of those nights spent baking are a lost bridge between my sister and I—treasured memories to look back on fondly but ones impossible to recapture. And yet the removal of this crutch has also forced me to examine how I will right the wrongs of the day in my own way—not by baking, but through the careers and choices that lie ahead.
Moving away is an exciting step towards independence and deciding how and what one wants to change in the world. In the midst of so many choices, the advice offered by family is a means of grounding oneself in times of transformation. Finding a niche in college involves exploring how one will contribute to society and improve the lives of others, but it also requires the recognition of the debt owed to those at home.
Growing up compels us to accept these recipes, relationships, and plans for future change. Family rituals become memories as traditions are re-made. It is important to maintain ties with those that helped us get where we are, and continue to want to see us succeed. Helping others starts by looking out for and appreciating those at home, and paying tribute to those left behind.

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Make New Friends and Keep the Old: Making Plans

Wednesday, June 9th, 2010

Do you remember those two friends I talked about before?  The couple who recently got engaged, the guy in the Navy and the girl in college?  Well, now they’ll be farther away from each other than New York to New Jersey – try New Jersey to Washington…state, that is.  See, Navy Boy just finished his first two years of training, I guess it is, and after that comes his assignment.  In this case, he’s being sent to Washington State.  College Girl, on the other hand, is still in college, and will be for the next couple of years – not even taking grad school into consideration.  On the one hand, she could go with him.  However, for the Navy to pay for her housing Navy Boy needs to sign on for another six years – that’s a really long time.  College Girl would also have to go to school out there, and leave all of her family and friends behind for the foreseeable future.  Or, they can be separated for even longer.  It’s a tough choice, and I can’t honestly say which is better or what I would do, because their situation seems so extreme.  Navy Boy’s brothers are all in some sort of service; his younger brother is also in the Navy and is about to be shipped overseas, so I guess his family has adapted to these big changes and grown used to talking to each other over Skype only.

The reason I bring this up is because College Girl and I were recently making plans for next summer – like driving to Vegas once we’re both 21, or even just a day trip to DC when we both have the time.  These kinds of plans, though, can all fall through depending on where our lives bring us over the next year.  Like Navy Boy, just last June the thought was that he would go to Virginia…Washington is a lot farther away than Virginia.

There’s that Death Cab for Cutie song, “What Sarah Said.”  In it, Ben Gibbard sings, “And it came to me then that every plan / is a tiny prayer to father time.”  Now, okay, that song is about watching someone die, but those lyrics really work in any situation.  In two years, a year, none of us can really know where we’ll be no matter how many plans we make, or vacations we plan.  But we still make plans, hoping that despite everything else we’ll be able to meet up with so and so for this or that.  I’m not really one for change, but it happens every day regardless of my feelings or opinions.  So, College Girl and I will make our plans for trips across the country cause that’s what friends do, and Navy Boy and College Girl will make their plans to get married and talk every night, no matter where they are, because that’s what people who love each other do.  There you are, father time, a few more prayers to look over.

-Mary K

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Chambers of Solitude: the October Schlump

Sunday, June 6th, 2010
Big Apple

New York City: you don't have to see all of it in a month

About a month into the fall semester, a phenomenon occurs that I refer to as the October Schlump. It’s easy to recognize: first-year students, (who every night up till then have turned Washington Square into a giant social playground,) suddenly disappear. For a few weeks they are conspicuously absent, and then slowly, as Halloween approaches, they begin to tentatively reemerge from their dorms. What happened?

I know, because I went through it. For students new to this amazing city, that first month is like a dream. So many wonderful things to see and do that were never available before; new friends to make, new places to go, new things to discover. But it really feels like a dream: there’s a constant sense that this is illusory, that at any moment you will wake up and this opportunity you worked so hard for will dissolve around you. When a new friend invites you to go to this party at their friend’s place in Brooklyn, you think, Brooklyn! When else will I get to see Brooklyn?! When you read about a new exhibit at the MoMA, you think, the MoMA! When else will I be able to visit the MoMA?! When you pass a new Mexican restaurant in the Village offering a two-for-one Margarita special, you think . . .  well, you get the idea.

This lifestyle is, of course, impossible to maintain. About a month in, you wake up one day, maybe around 5 PM, and think, what day is it? You realize that you slept through an entire day of classes. See, you meant to just take a short nap – it was 3 AM, you’d just gotten back from a party at a friend’s – Happy Wednesday! – and you realized you didn’t have any clean clothes, so what a perfect time to do laundry! You threw a load in the washer, and then came back up to finish that essay on Socrates – that’s what New York’s about, multitasking! – and about two pages in thought, I’ll just take a quick nap – an hour or two, tops. After all, you haven’t slept in two days, so it’s about time to give the body a little refresher. Now here you are, essay not finished, classes missed, your load of laundry having been removed from the washer and scattered aimlessly all over the laundry room floor by some jerk. And even after sleeping twelve hours, you still feel tired. Or not tired, more than tired – exhausted. Your resources have been depleted; nothing in you wants to get out of bed, go anywhere, do anything. The momentum is gone.

This is the October Schlump. Although skipping meals and missing sleep are major contributing factors, the Schlump is not a disease, at least not physically. It’s the mental state that settles in when you realize that you barely have any idea what you did in the past month. You were in constant motion, you went and saw and did a million amazing things, but you can barely remember any of them. Some of them you liked, some of them you didn’t, but which were which?

So, for about a week, you don’t go out. You stay inside, do homework, get lots of sleep, eat right, and figure out what to do next. In that time, you realize that New York City isn’t going anywhere. It won’t disappear under your feet one day; it will be there the next day when you wake up, and the day after that, and the day after that. You will have at least four years, at most the rest of your life, to explore. So after that week, when friends call you up and invite you to this or that, you can say no, not tonight, rain-check. You don’t even need to give a reason. You can (in fact, you must) spend a night in now and then. And you must do is reflect. You are swimming in a sea of new experiences, new stimuli, new ideas, and some are good for you and some are not. You can have all these experiences but if you never stop to reflect on what they mean, they are – literally – meaningless.

As anyone who’s lived in a dorm can attest, dorms can be a lot of fun, but they aren’t really the best places for quiet reflection. After my October Schlump, I began to seek out places I could go to be by myself, to think and ponder, to reflect and debate. I can’t give you the answers to the big questions of life that all college students confront during those four years – I don’t have them. But I can share with you come places I think will provide the stillness, the solitude, within the bustling metropolis that we call home, to find some of these answers. And I will call them Chambers of Solitude. More to come.

And in the meantime, if you need to a moment of calm and some advice on chill-axing, (sorry, I won’t use that word again,) go here.

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