How Not to Do Anything: An Expert Guide – How Not to Get a Job

Image Credit: http://www.gajizmo.com/5-reasons-you-are-still-unemployed/

Image Credit: http://www.gajizmo.com/5-reasons-you-are-still-unemployed/

If you play your cards right, you can avoid employment while enrolled in school, but as soon as you’re no longer a student, the pressure to get a job becomes increasingly difficult to withstand. After all, even doing nothing costs a little bit of money. And whether you live with friends or relatives, for some reason people generally don’t like to have lodgers with no income. So here are three methods of stirring up some cash while steering clear of the undue strain of gainful employment.

  • Find a corner of the social safety net and make yourself a nice little nest. Social programs may be unpopular today, but we have them in place to take care of those who are unfortunately, temporarily, or temperamentally unable to find work. Unemployment assistance and food stamps can go a long way towards staving off that existential disaster spelled J-O-B.
  • Sell your time in tiny slices. Did you know that at any research university, there are hundreds of grad students who could never get their degrees without paying people just like you to participate in their studies? Or that no new cereal box design goes into circulation without undergoing the vigorous examination of a paid focus group? You can often make several times minimum wage for a few hours of what can only loosely be called work, and you might even contribute to our understanding of the brain, or an improved Fruity Pebbles box!
  • Find a sugarmomma/-daddy. This is really your best shot at preempting the need to work. Since ancient times, boys and girls have dreamt of falling in love with the prince or princess so that they will never have to work again. It’s the ultimate fairy tale, and in a country as economically stratified as America, there could always be a dot-com wizard or hedge fund ace just around the corner, waiting to whisk you away to a life of endless leisure and decades-long naps.

By Aaron Brown


Aaron Brown was one of the Campus Clipper’s publishing interns, who wrote an e-book   “How Not To Do Anything: An Expert Guide.” If you like Aaron’s writing, follow our blog for more chapters from his e-book. We have the most talented interns ever and we’re so proud of them! For over 20 years, the Campus Clipper has been offering awesome student discounts in NYC,  from the East Side to Greenwich Village. Along with inspiration, the company offers students a special coupon booklet and the Official Student Guide, which encourage them to discover new places in the city and save money on food, clothing and services.  

At the Campus Clipper, not only do we help our interns learn new skills, make money, and create wonderful e-books, we give them a platform to teach others. Check our website for more student savings and watch our YouTube video showing off some of New York City’s finest students during last year’s Welcome Week.

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